Can what we believe about others, determine what we perceive? Can our beliefs cause us to only see others act and behave in ways that support our belief or our program about them? Absolutely. Our belief also shapes our own behaviors while with that person, which creates and action reaction, mind game relationship.
The mind is always looking to point out or prove a current belief or program is correct. For example, if you believe a person can't be trusted, your belief or program will cause you to focus in on any behavior that proves and supports your current belief. Even when they do behave in trustworthy ways, the mind will explain it away and make an excuse for their improved behavior, such as, "well, they just did that because they knew I was watching and were afraid of getting caught."
When you are with this person, you will also be putting off the " I can't trust you vibe". This will shape your behaviors and interactions with them. The mind will say, "watch them closely", "check up on them", "read their emails"...now the mind has you behaving in defensive, disrespectful ways out of fear.
The person on the receiving end of this is also hearing the mind speak to them and will then begin behaving accordingly. The mind may convince them to become defensive and defiant. Now the mind has an excuse it can use to promote untrustworthy behavior. It may tell them "it doesn't matter what you do, they are never going to trust you anyway, might as well go ahead". The mind may also attack them and say, "see how untrustworthy you are?" "You will never change." The person may then just give up and do whatever the mind tells them to do.
What happens though if you remove yourself from this action reaction game the mind has going? What happens when you refuse to support this faulty program? What happens when you decide to refuse to believe anything negative about a person, ever? If you can win this battle over the mind, you will free yourself from the game, thereby giving the other person an opportunity to break free from this faulty belief or program as well. You just created the space necessary for positive change and regained your own peace of mind. Win Win A.J.
Angie Johnsey is a speaker, author and world-renowned Mind expert. A hypnotherapist and psychiatric nurse by trade, Angie assists clients all over the world to become aware of their mental and emotional patterns, bring clarity and peace to lives that were once full of stress and suffering, and choose the feelings they would like to have to transform their lives.