Are you being Mentally Abused?
Do have an abuser living in your head? A voice that tells you how wrong you are, or how stupid you are, how you shouldn't have done this, or said that? Constantly making you question yourself and the things you do and say?
If yes, then you are being mentally abused. If you listen to this voice long enough, your outer world will soon match your inner world. Meaning, you will find that you attract and stay with those who treat you exactly as your inner voice treats you. It's time for this to stop.
When we are listening to constant criticism and negative judgments in our head all day, we become frustrated and angry. Then when we interact with others, our words are short and can be full of criticism. We can become exactly like the voice in our head. If you interact with someone like this, who always points out the negative about you, know that they have an inner abuser doing this to them all day long as well. Also remember, what they say is never personal. It's never about you, although it seems that way. It's about their own inner pain.
The good news here is, as soon as you make the voice be nicer to you in your inner world, your outer world will soon catch up and begin to change. You will find people treating you differently. Treating you will love and respect. It all starts with changing the inner voice to a more loving and respectful voice. Let's stop the mental abuse where it starts.. in the head. A.J.
Stop the Wound before it Starts
If your life experience is full of one problem after the next, it's safe to say you may have emotional wounds. Old wounds create and shape your current experiences. Let's clean them up and heal them pronto, so you can start experiencing a better life.
Where do emotional wounds start? I'll give you one guess.. Yep..the voice of the mind. When things happen in our experience that are traumatic, startling, sad, scary, our body responds naturally by having an emotional response. ...In the absence of the mind, these emotions would run their course and then fade and release from the body.
Unfortunately, we are up against the voice in the head that will talk about what just happened for hours, days, years. Each time we listen and agree with the story being built around the experience, our emotional body responds by having the original emotional response over and over but with less and less intensity. The intensity is less because it is now only mind created. By mind created I mean only happening in our memory, not our real experience.
For example, say you were in a car accident. Initially you would have an emotional fear reaction, or shock. Everything begins to settle down after the accident, and here enters the mind. It may start to replay the scary memory for you over and over which serves no purpose but to help you feel the intense fear over and over. Then it may want to go to blame if you were in the accident with another car. It may create stories for you where you are the victim. Now it may use stories that build resentment.
The event, start to finish, was actually only about 10 minutes out of your life, but thanks to the mind, you are now suffering emotionally from what happened for years afterward. An emotional wound has been created by believing the stories and interpretations of the mind and you find yourself, unable to let it go. You have now attached to the mind created story and adopted it as your personal story. You may even make it part of an identity of you. If you feel you have emotional wounds that were created by believing the minds stories around the event, refer to the previous article on releasing emotions and healing old wounds.
Old wounds are like vibrational beacons that send out the vibration of all the emotions wrapped up in it. These vibrations set up experiences in your outer world to enable you to revisit this wound over and over until you decide to let it go. Life will continuously tell you what wounds you have by bringing situation after situation that pokes at these wounds until you agree to heal them and change to a perspective of truth. Once healed, your life begins to attract better, more fun and enjoyable experiences. A.J
Sometimes we become so wounded and low on the emotional scale that when someone suggest reaching for hope, happiness, and excitement, we feel it just can't be done. It actually is too big of a leap to make emotionally and most of the time is not a reasonable request.
So let's start where you are and climb up from there. If you are sad, angry, jealous, or fearful, just reach for peace. How? That begins with full acceptance of your current circumstance. When you can full accept each situation as is, the mind will stop judging and labeling the situation as good or bad and will stop torturing you by replaying the memory of the situation, or telling you what someone else is doing or thinking. You just say "Ok, this happened. It's over now. I know I can't go back in time and do anything to change what has already happened. I refuse to allow my mind to take me down to low places and keep me in low places regarding this situation by telling me lies, distorting the truth, and creating an emotional wound." Emotional wounds are created when we accept a lie the mind tells, as truth.
Each time the mind brings this issue back to your attention, firmly state, "that's over. I am now at peace." If you are not yet at peace just by affirming this statement, meaning you can still feel a bothered or disturbed feeling in your body, then you already have a wound here that is being agitated. You've accepted a belief about yourself at some point during your life, that is untrue and causing dysfunction. It's time to release a trapped emotion regarding the issue.
To do this.. first bring up the emotion in your body as strong as you can. Gauge it from 1-10. 10 is "I'm about to explode!" 1 is "I'm really fine. I feel nothing". Pull the emotion up by using memory or letting the mind talk to you about the situation. Try to hold the intensity of the emotion as a feeling in your body. Really feel it in your body as strong as you can make it using the mind and memory. The key is focusing on the feeling, not the words used by the mind. When you try to hold the feeling, you realize you can't without the feeling being fed by the mind. Then the mind begins to run out of ammunition, and the feeling begins to fade. When you purposefully try to hold the intensity, the strength of the emotion begins to fade and soon die.
You will soon find that bringing old thoughts and memories to mind regarding this issue, fail at creating an emotional response within you. Now you can repeat the old story and feel nothing. It has just become something that happened once and is no longer a part of the identity of you. The emotion has been released and the wound cleared out. To heal the wound completely, speak some truth. Tell yourself the truth about that old situation, and it will now be a thing of the past. Wound healed. A.J.
Angie Johnsey is a speaker, author and world-renowned Mind expert. A hypnotherapist and psychiatric nurse by trade, Angie assists clients all over the world to become aware of their mental and emotional patterns, bring clarity and peace to lives that were once full of stress and suffering, and choose the feelings they would like to have to transform their lives.